11 Things That Will NOT Happen In Avengers: Endgame

It was only a matter of time. With the latest Avengers movie shaping up to be one of the biggest cinematic events in recent years, someone eventually had to dump a bunch of spoilers online to ruin it for everyone else. And try as you might, over the next few weeks, you will hear things about Avengers: Endgame, not knowing if it’s an actual spoiler or not. Because how could you know the difference if you’ve never seen the movie? That’s where I come in. After a long-con game of catfish with the Russo Brothers, I confirmed everything that will definitely happen in Endgame and can tell you for sure that…

Continue reading “11 Things That Will NOT Happen In Avengers: Endgame”

If You Remember These Awesome Cartoons, Then Project X Has Failed

The late ‘90s/early 2000s really were the best time. They had the best music, films, cartoons, and it was around that time that the Black Office of the shadow world government finally got funding for their mind-control experiment. 1,000,000 gallons of proprietary chemical cocktails in the world water supply later and it looks like Project X has been a total success. For the most part. We are still occasionally getting reports of people who seem to remember what REALLY happened 20+ years ago, so let’s do a test, OK? If you recall any of the following 1990s/2000s cartoons, then please report to the nearest Black Office operative for immediate termination. Your cooperation is greatly appreciated.

Continue reading “If You Remember These Awesome Cartoons, Then Project X Has Failed”

9 Mind-Blowing Facts You Never Knew About The Cast Of Saved By The Bell

Since first premiering 30 years ago, Saved by the Bell continues to be a show that existed. It told the story of friends who went to school and sometimes ate food, but the friends weren’t the same. No, they were different in many regards. Hair color for one. They were also portrayed by different people. Here are some facts about them:

Continue reading “9 Mind-Blowing Facts You Never Knew About The Cast Of Saved By The Bell”

Heartwarming! Trash-Faced Fatso Has The Voice Of An Angel!

On the latest episode of the hit reality show The Real Idols Of America Got Voices, the whole world held its breath, then quietly vomited in their mouths, when Jerry Burgle took the stage. At 450lbs and with a face that only a mother could use to fend off wild animals, everyone naturally assumed that Jerry was there to commit suicide on live television after accidentally catching a glimpse of himself in a puddle of grease that was also his breakfast that morning. But then the man-o-lard started to sing.

Continue reading “Heartwarming! Trash-Faced Fatso Has The Voice Of An Angel!”

How To Know You’re Ready For Your First Podcast

There inevitable comes a time when you and your best friend share a very special moment. It’s early evening, you are in good moods, maybe you’ve had some beers, and you’ve just finished talking for an hour about the many ways that Batman is unrealistic. And then someone says: what if there was a mic between us? What if you recorded all your talks and put them up online so that everyone knows that there’s no way Bruce Wayne could have kept his Batman identity a secret. It’s such a big step, though. How can you be sure it’s the right time, or even the right thing to do? This how:

Continue reading “How To Know You’re Ready For Your First Podcast”

Academy Apologizes For Leaving Tim Allen’s Name Out Of “In Memoriam” Segment

Every year, the Academy Awards honor the prominent members of the film industry who have died the previous year in a segment called “In Memoriam.” However, the 91st edition of the show caught a lot of criticism for once again failing to include actor-comedian Tim Allen on the list, despite the people’s numerous pleas. The Academy apologized profusely but pointed out that they only did it because Mr. Allen is still alive.

Continue reading “Academy Apologizes For Leaving Tim Allen’s Name Out Of “In Memoriam” Segment”